From The Addams Family Movie

"Gomez, last night, you were, unhinged. You were like some desperate, howling daemon. You frightened me. Do it again."

-Morticia

"Dont torture yourself, Gomez. That's my job."

-Morticia

"But I didnt hate my mother! It was an accident!"

-Gomez

"Our Credo: 'Sic Gorgiamus Allos Subjectatos Nunc.' We gladly feast on those who would subdue us: not just pretty words."

-Morticia

Gomez: "Unhappy, darling?"
Morticia:  "Oh, yes. Yes, completely."

"Look at her. I would die for her. I would kill for her. Either way, what bliss."

-Gomez

"I've smoked since I was five. Mother insisted."

-Gomez

"What a lovely woman. So chilly."

-Gomez

Gomez: "To live without you, only that would be torture."
Morticia: "A day alone, only that would be death."

"Uncle Knicknack's winter wardrobe. Uncle Knicknack's summer wardrobe. Uncle Knicknack."

-Morticia

Morticia: "Imagine if Fester did come back - half alive, barely human, a rotting shell."
Gomez: "Don't tease."

"Thing, you're a handful."

-Morticia

"It's for charity. Widows and orphens. We need more of them."

-Morticia

"Which is the real you? The loathsome underhanded monster you've become, or the loathsome underhanded monster we came to love."

-Morticia

"Welcome, honored guests. Entrails?"

-Morticia

[Wednesday is hooking up an electric chair.] Wednesday: "Pugsley, sit in the chair."

Pugsley: "Why?"

Wednesday: "Because we're going to play a game."

Pugsley: "What game?"

Wednesday: [strapping him in] It's called, "Is There a God?"

"That's the spirit, Thing! Lend a hand!"

-Gomez

[Watching Pugsley sleep]"He looks so sweet. Just like a little entree."

-Morticia

Wednesday: "Please pass the salt."

Morticia: "And what do we say?"

Wednesday : "NOW."

Morticia: "Children, what are you doing?"

Wednesday: "I'm going to electrocute him."

Morticia: "But we're late for the charity auction."

Wednesday: 'But, Mother..."

Morticia: "I said no."

 Pugsley: "Pleeaaaase?"

Morticia: "Oh, all right."

"Wednesday, play with your food!"

-Morticia

Gomez: "How long has it been since we waltzed?"

Morticia: "Oh, Gomez... hours."

"Eyes, fingers, toes: two, ten, eleven."

-Gomez

"They say that a man who represents himself in court has a fool for a client. And with God as my witness, I am that fool!"

-Gomez

"We danced the Mamushka while Nero fiddled, we danced the Mamushka at Waterloo. We danced the Mamushka for Jack the Ripper, and now, Fester Addams, this Mamushka is for you."

-Gomez 

Girl: "Is this made from real lemons?"
Wednesday: "Yes."
Girl: "I only like all natural fruits and beverages, organically grown, with no preservatives. Are you sure they're real lemons?"
Wednesday: "Yes."
Girl: "Well, I'll tell you what, I'll buy a cup, if you buy a box of my delicious Girl Scout cookies. Do we have a deal?"
Wednesday: "Are they made from real Girl Scouts?"

Pugsley: "Are they dead?"
Wednesday: "Does it matter?"

"Hansel pushed the poor defenseless witch into the oven, where she was burned alive, writhing in agony. Now, boys and girls, what do you think that feels like?"

-Morticia

Margaret: "What are you, darling? Where's your costume?"
Wednesday: "This is my costume. I'm a homocidal maniac; they look just like everyone else."

Morticia: "It's Gomez, I'm terribly worried about him.  He won't eat, can't sleep, he keeps coughing up blood..."

Margaret: "He coughs up blood?"

Morticia: "Not like he used to."

"Ah, there's Tully.  Romping with Gate."

-Morticia

Dr. Pinder-Schloss: "The human spirit is a hard thing to kill!"

Grandmama: "Even with a chainsaw."

Gomez: "Screams in the night can only mean one thing--"

Morticia: "He's home."

From Addams Family Values

Wednesday: "Father, what is it?"

Gomez: "It's an Addams!"

[They're going swimming.] Amanda: "I'll be the victim."

Wednesday: "All your life."

Pugsley: "We don't hug."

Gary: "Oh, you're just shy."

Wednesday: "We're not shy, we're contagious."

Amanda : "Why are you dressed like somebody died?"

Wednesday: "Wait."

Gomez: "Children, why do you hate the baby?"

Pugsley: "We don't hate him. We just wanna play with him."

Wednesday: "Especially his head."

"Don't I yearn? And ache? And shop? Don't I deserve love? And jewelry?"

-Debbie

[The dancer in the cake doesn't pop out.] Gomez: "Was she in the cake before you baked it?" [Lurch hangs his head.]

Wednesday: "I'm not perky"

Amanda: "Well, that's for damn sure."

Gomez: "He has my father's eyes."

Morticia: "Gomez, take those out of his mouth."

Gomez: "You need someone, someone very special. Someone who won't press charges."

Fester: "Oh, I'd like that!"

Girl: "And then Mommy kissed Daddy, and the angel told the stork, and the stork flew down from heaven, and left the diamond under a leaf, in the cabbage patch, and the diamond turned into a baby!"

Pugsley: "Our parents are having a baby too."

Wednesday: "They had sex."

Debbie: "These Addams men, where do you find them?"

Morticia: "It has to be damp."

Debbie: "Fester, I have a confession to make--I'm a virgin."

Fester: "You are?"

Debbie:"Yes."

Fester: "What's that?"

Joel: "Il'l never forget you."

Wednesday: "You wont?"

Joel: "You're too weird."